Appointment with trainee psychologist.

Hey all, well today I had an appointment with the trainee psychologist day. We went though a feelings and thoughts and that was quite had as I feel really disgusted by them. I've also started doing more exercise as I've become a bit obsessed with my weight which isn't bad as im over weight. Also trying to get over a huge haribo addiction since stopping smoking nearly a year ago. I have an appointment next week so hopefully I will have more info Take care TAM X

On the road to.......recovery, hopefully...I think x

Hey all Sorry its been so long since I last wrote, its been an up and down Journey. Well I think my tablets are finally kicking in, I get some really good days. I can now walk to town with my baby girl and even take the kids to school on my own or with baby girl. Yes I still have bad thoughts from the pure-o, but I am still learning to let the thought be and carry on. I will get there. But on other fronts things are bad. My husband has developed a addiction to a game called world of warcraft and its getting me down. He has let his business go down the toilet basically and we have stopped using the car for the summer to try and get a smaller car in the fall, but not a lot of money is coming in. I subconsciousnessly started to punish him by buying on eBay which I have now stopped cause it was causing more harm to the family. Now I just swear at him. Im toying with the idea of writing a book about my experiences with pure-o and Hyperemsis gravim during my last pregnancy. On other bad news a old school friend died the other week and her funeral was today but thanks to hubby I couldn't go as it was in the next village, but sent cards. She was happily married with 6 kids. Life is so unfair. OK I will try to remember to write next week. Love TAM X

Second vist........

Hi all,
I saw my CPN again for the second time and she asked me to do a sort of timeline. Basic wrote down all the main events in my life to see if has any impact. Think im doing a novel. On a diffrent note my IQ test came back ot was at 147, not sure if that means anything.
The Ocd is having its moments so to speak but a bit of dio-phomatic breath does help so all you pure o people try it dont give the thoughts strenght.


Anyways gota shoot x

love

TAM xx

quick how-do.

Hey all.
Well saw my new cpn yesterday, I have seen her before I became very agoraphobic shes great. We went though a history and she determind that my childhood was very stressful,which yeah... I can understand I guess, my brother had the mind of an 18 month old baby but the body of a man so when he had a tantrum someone got hurt but it wasnt his fault bless him. He was starved of oxygen at birth so had quite complex brain damage and suffered from grand mal fits from 18 till his death aged 30. She also confirmed to way to stop pure o is to accept it but its so hard.


Well dears see ya soon x

-TheAnxiousMummy x

seeing new therapist tomorrow.

Hi all how ya doing?
Im not to bad, I see a new thepist tomorrow as my original cpn has gone on maternity leave. She sould have had her baby by now, congrats katie if your reading. Also I know this is stearing away from the subject but a good friend of mine gave birth to her 9th baby, well done babes. Ok back to the suject on hand. Yes im seeing a new theripst/cpn and I am nervous because to be honest im a little ashamed of suffering from ocd spisifically pure o. I try to portray myself as the purfect munmy, you know the kind kids have everything they need, mummy is a superhero who can do anything but sometimes its hard so hid the tears.
I let you know what happens also if you watch one born every minite then please take a minute to look at a fantasic blog. Address is:heatherfrancesca.wordpress.com always cheers me up.

Love
TheAnxiousMummy.

getting there.

Hi all,
Well its been a while hope you all had a good Christmas. Well I think my meds are kicking in its bee 17 weeks I think since starting them and I dont seem to be able to cry anymore, dont know if thats a good or bad thing?
Ive been reading a book called imp of the mind which is quite intresting and covers the subject of pure O very well.

My baby girl is growing up fast laughing alot which does help but mother in law still bringing me down with her gerneral negativity (she constanly moans about britian as she is German and Germany is wonderful aparently can think why you live here.)
We started trying to budget with food so I make a meal planner and yeah it seems to cut back our spending but I get board and buy stuff of the internet lol. I was thinking of doing a vlog on you tube on verious anxiety subjects. Please let me know what you think.

Bue for now I hope to be on soon

untill next time

TAM x

Its been so long.

Hi all.
Sorry I havent posted in a while Ive only just managed to get myself together so to speak.Well as you may have guess our baby girl arrived on the 4th of September 2011 16 days late after being induced, the labor was about two hours long. Everything was great untill about an hour after my labor my OCD took a bad turn. I suddenly daw everything as a danger to my baby including myself. When I got home ot was even worse I loved my baby so much but kept having intrusive thoughts,it was a living hell.After a few days I admitted myself to Qmc mother and baby unit to get sorted. After staying in for about two weeks my Dr said I was suffering from pure O and started me on meds. That was 7 weeks ago and I still get intrusive thoughts but my mood has inproved but its still hell. I just gota learn the thoughts arnt me its OCD.

Thanks for reading

love
Theanxiousmummy.